Children’s relationship with their parents and other care providers can be described by an attachment theory. The theory of attachment in children concentrates on the conducts and feelings that infants express toward adults they communicate to. The theory explains that in situations of suffering or fear children seek to behave in some particular attachment pattern motivated by need for survival.

According to the attachment theory, infants build up dissimilar types of connections depending on previous experience of relationships and communications with their care providers. The way a child is attached to his or her parent naturally influences the way he or she communicates with other individuals at times when the parent is absent. Research has discovered that there are at least four attachment categories recognized in children. These are secure, avoidant, ambivalent and disorganized relationships.

Secure relationship is a type of attachment when a child depends freely on his parent or caregiver. This type of attachment is usually developed when “the child feels valued, understood, accepted, and is helped by caring parents to make choices.” (Child Safety Services) Children falling into this category feel comfortable when being at kindergarten. They play readily with other kids, and even if being upset can be comforted easily by a friendly adult. Children develop this type of attachment when dealing with parents who are highly consistent in the way they satisfy their children’s needs, and who typically respond in a loving and gentle way.

Avoidant relationship is a type of attachment when a child is inclined to take care of himself, rather than to depend on his parents and yearn for the feeling of safety. The avoidant children learn to conceal their emotions not to distress their parents and thus not to experience negative responses. “It is more comfortable for the child to be self-reliant, which makes it more likely that the parent will stay close.” (Child Safety Services) Avoidant children tend to behave more independently then their peers; they get easily frustrated, have troubles playing with other kids and may even act aggressively. They do not build strong relationships with caregivers in the kindergarten. This category of attachment usually occurs when the parent has troubles recognizing or reacting delicately to the child’s needs.

Ambivalence is one more way a child may be involved into an insecure relationship with his parents. Children develop ambivalent attachment when feeling insecure about whether their needs will or will not be responded. This type of behavior occurs when parents are incompatible in responding to their children’s anguish, while the concern and guard they happen to occasionally provide are generally tentative and unproductive. Ambivalent children are usually very dependent on others and have troubles taking care of themselves. They are predisposed to behave as if being younger than they really are and may well appear over-sentimental. They get upset easily, often cry, and strive to be in the center of everyone’s attention. “These children often develop resistant attachments to their parents, behaving in fussy and inconsolable ways when upset. They appear to want contact with their parents, yet resist that contact.”(Infant Caregiver Project)

Disorganized relationship develops when the parent’s behavior is impulsive, fear-provoking and when the parent tends to neglect or not to accept the child’s needs. “The child is in a situation of fear without a solution. Parents do not care for the child, appear out of control, are hostile and helpless to protect the child.” (Child Safety Services) Disorganized children usually come from troublesome families, where some form of neglect or abuse is being practiced. Disorganized children are generally hard to deal with. Their behavior is often unpredictable; they may act in ways that are difficult to understand. They have troubles communicating with other children and with adults. When playing games they may imagine scenes that are perplexing and creepy.