As Quentin Crisp once said “If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style.” This is exactly what I was telling myself when I was dismissed from college for the third time. I was sitting near my sick father who had had a heart attack and was able neither to eat nor to drink. The more I thought about my life the more questions appeared in my head. Why did it happen that I was out of school again? Would they ever accept me again? Was it really my fault or was I a victim of my family troubles? I never got even a single answer to my questions; however, what I realized was that as Philip K. Dick said “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.” I set myself real clear targets and was just looking for my key to success to open the door of my future, which was still closed and still unreachable for me.

As a freshman, I spent little time working on my school projects and never paid too much attention to the material that we were given in class. I guess that at that age you do not understand all the importance of the early knowledge and studies in general, which are the key stones for the future career. Moreover, there was nobody to guide me and put me in the right direction. I experienced serious family problems that had a great impact on my emotional condition. Thus it helped me in certain way as well. I matured and learned how to deal with specific obstacles that I faced. Nonetheless, I still was not able to make it in college; consequently, I was soon dismissed. Fortunately, due to my own will and the committee’s flexibility and understanding I was accepted back and continued my studies.

The next thing that affected me in a great way was my close aunt’s sickness – she was diagnosed with breast cancer. It is extremely complicated to express the feelings that burst in my soul in abundance. As a result, I had to start working which, undoubtedly, only worsened my results in the academic sphere. My GPA went down again and the college committee dismissed me again.

Of course, the family issue that I had was not the only reason for my dismissals. I was the only one to be blamed for that, as far as it was the choice of my major and schedule that lead to such consequences. To be more specific, I am a biology major, which seems quite dubious to me today, when I look at my school years. I was always good at History and Philosophy, but mathematics and chemistry were far too complicated for me. This is extremely intense to perform well in something you are not proficient in. The reason that I did not change for an English or History major was that I was not sure that I would be able to get a well-paid job in the contemporary world of fierce competition. To make things worse, I am not that stable financially, therefore, an opportunity to work as some kind of a researcher or get a job in a lab would have saved me. Nonetheless, my views changed drastically and now I am absolutely sure what I want to be in life.